translation. 'kanata' by heidi.

recently I have been into translating sad songs only. this one is 'kanata' by heidi. - one of the few slow sad dark songs that I love among the works by this band 

a really touching phrase for me that made me want to translate the lyrics is 'I do not want to lose again'

the 'aftershadow' thing is actually a difficult one to translate. actually I made up the word, forgive me. according to explanation here, 'kageokuri' means an entertainment when on a sunny day one should stare for at least 10 seconds at his own shadow and then raise his eyes to the sky, and (due to the phenomenon of sight adaptation, I guess) the silhouette will be seen as a white figure in the sky. again, a beautiful concept that we do not have in other languages
lyrics written down by me and checked with the help of this page

original
 

遠ざかる君の後姿を追う
もう彼方、そして僕はもういないよ

疲れ果てる心が何かを求めるまで
カラカラに渇き続けていた
明日なんていらない、今日すら欲しくはない
たった今この瞬間でさえ
そんな僕を許して

ああ、失うのは二度とは嫌だから
その手を離したくないよ
ああ、今度こそは君の瞳の中
その場所で生きられるように
あの空へ

少しだけ暑い夕陽を浴びながら
あの雲が君を僕を導いてる

目を閉じればそこにはあの日のままの君が
僕の隣で笑ってくれた
君は何かを言って振り返ることはなく
やがて僕から見えなくなった
まるで影送りだね

ああ、失うのは二度とは嫌だから
その手を離したくないよ
ああ、今度こそは君の瞳の中
その場所で生きられるように

ねえ、忘れないで例えどこにいても
繋がったこの世界には
そう、君の声が聞こえた気がしたよ
またいつか会えますように
あの空で

会えるよね

translation
 

I am chasing your retreating figure
It is already beyond, and I no longer exist
Desiring for something my exhausted heart
Went on withering to complete dryness
I do not need tomorrow, I do not even need today,
If only this very instant…
Forgive me for this

Ah, I do not want to lose once again,
So I do not want to release your hand
Ah, this time, for sure, in your eyes
I wish that I could live there
So to the sky…

Basking a little in the setting sun
That cloud is leading you and me
When I close my eyes, you are, like those days,
Smiling by my side
You said something and without even turning back
You finally disappeared from my side,
Like an ‘aftershadow’

Ah, I do not want to lose once again,
So I do not want to release your hand
Ah, this time, for sure, in your eyes
I wish that I could live there
Do not ever forget, no matter how far you are,
In this world that links us
Yes, it seems I heard your voice
I wish that we will meet again
In that sky
We will be able to meet, won’t we?

my humble opinion on heidi.

heidi. is a very special band to me. I spent 2 or 3 weeks constantly listening to them when in Osaka - while dressing up and putting on makeup in the morning, while going to school, while having a walk in the streets, while shopping somewhere, while sitting in a train, while going anywhere else. I listened to their songs again in winter when I suddenly felt I missed their sound. I listened to them again this summer, exactly a year since I discovered them - which a very strange thing for me, as I usually avoid listening to the same artist during the same time of the year. I listened to them again in September when they released a new album. then I reviewed my heidi. playlist and added several songs both from the new album and from the ones I already knew, making it almost twice longer (25 songs versus 13), and being really surprised at how I failed to appreciate several their earlier songs considering them too plain

and I don't get bored with them. there were cases when I listened to a playlist created some time ago and just clicked 'next' and 'next', never listening any song to the end. sometimes I dropped an old playlist in the middle, or listened to only 1 song I wanted. heidi. is different. I return to them again and again. and probably will do this for a while

after I liked heidi. so much, I thought I might study their genre affiliation and search for similar artists. I  downloaded nagoya kei. I tried recommendations of jpopsuki system, last.fm and musicwn.com. I found only 1 band who released only several songs which have the sound relatively comparable to heidi.'s throughout all their discography. what the only conclusion I might draw from this fact? heidi. has its unique style which genre determines only partially

therefore, I see no meaning in describing every song like I did previously. this is what I put into my playlist

• hakuchuumu
• CLOVER
• hakana hana
• Fly
• Shinda sekai
• Last Piece
• Sentimental
• Natsu Ichizu
• synchro
• meiteki
• mirai no hate
• Heaven
• KODAMA
• mugen loop
• =
• Sora no Tenjouga
• Kodou
• Gekkou Showtime
• Chaser
• SIXTH SENSE
• twilight town
• another fish
• landscape
• kumorizora ni wa renmoyou
• kanata

I would divide all the songs I like into 3 groups. the first one includes those songs that make people describe heidi. as nagoya kei - dark ones, with dark melody and lyrics, such as 'shinda sekai', 'kodou' or 'mirai no hate' - the former even has the theme in its title. in the second group I would put their very opposite - there aren't a lot of them, light songs, calmer than the usual ones, even tender, I daresay. they are 'sora no tenjouga' and 'kumorizora...', and also 'ao no sekai' which isn't among my favourites, though. and the last group are those I love most, those that strike my mind and make me unable to stand still. what is really unusual, most bands start as inexperienced indies of bad quality and I usually skip their first albums, but with time they polish their style and skills and become really memorable and unique. this happened, for example, with 'Art-School'. heidi.'s start was much better. 'hakuchuumu' is from their second single, 'tis the 4th song they released, but 'tis the song that I love most and no later song of theirs can beat it, there only are some that equal. I would underline 'Last Piece', 'Heaven', and 'another fish' 

probably 'twould make some sense to make a special list of pieces that don't belong to the groups described, such as 'hakana hana', '=' - an interesting instrumental, and 'twilight town', which are very, very stylish

conclusion

I love them... I wonder if I this feeling will change?